Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Area Disney Fan Dreams the Rock-Impossible

(Highland Park, NJ) -- A quiet afternoon in the Garden State was interrupted early on Wednesday with the muffled shouts of a local school psychologist and avid Disney fan. The fan, Scott Kraiterman, 38, was described by neighbors as being uncontrollably elated, suffering from what appeared to be an incredible idea.

"Truthfully, it was difficult for anyone to come to a kind of consensus for what he was screaming about," explained Highland Park police chief, Stephen Rizco. "One second, our guy is writing out a warning for a forty in a thirty on Woodland, the next, a school professional is rushing into the street with a crazy idea about a cartoon mouse and rock music."

Witnesses later detailed the idea, explaining that the New Jersey resident wanted nothing more than to immediately see any of the more beloved Disney characters as additional members of the storied rock megagroup, Metallica.

"What I'm not totally sure of," laughed Rizco, "is whether we're talking about a Disney fan coming up with an impossible idea or a Metallica fan coming up with, frankly, a totally ridiculous idea. And I like Metallica, too haha"

Kraiterman was not available for immediate comment.


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